Dear B: Yes to Yoga?


Dear B,

It’s shorts and bikini season again and I want to lose 5-11 pounds and tone up a bit. What should I do? I tried to Crossfit but once I realized I was a girl and wanted to stay that way I never went back. What do you think about yoga? I’ve dabbled here and there but never really made an effort – should I make yoga apart of my weekly exercise regime? Do I have to wear Lulu Lemon only? Do I have to pay a million dollars a class? Is it required to bring my own incense?

Lylas, A******

Dear Girl at Bonnaroo Who Doesn’t Wear a Bra with Her Tie-Dyed Halter,

First of all, calm down. What’s with all the questions? You’re asking for advice in the work-out arts, not how to tell your boyfriend of two months you cheated on him with the doorman.

B of all, you’ve come to the right place because yoga is my jam. I go to a private class once a week with a yogi whose energy is likened to a white, skinny Oprah and ladies who giggle with me through some challenging poses. Not everyone can be a baller and score a weekly private session, but here are some important things to look for in a yoga practice:

 Attractive teacher who is bendier than you

 Fellow yogis who shower and have nice feet

Expensive enough to be worth it but not more than a nice dinner at Kayne Prime

Music that makes you feel like you’re at a spa in Bali

Nice, homey space to make your practice both comfortable and happy

 Within walking distance of a nice dinner spot (you’ll thank me later!)

So my dear, I’ve found that I am 98% grumpier when I miss a session and can honestly say I am a happier human for the rest of the week after my  shavasana. I suggest you grab a mat and glide to a yoga studio near you. Namaste.


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